A PALANQUIN OF STARS..

 

A humble dedication to Aravind Suchindra and his friends who made this Diwali special for a few kids! :)

While our lives shines in the darkness of hope,
The world is lit with the lamp of light.
We come together,close our eyes,
Hear the chatter,chirp and see the smiles so bright.

We pray for a mother fussing us with sweets,
A father holding our hands in the noisy streets.
A brother helping us welcome the guests,
A sister who made sure we were dressed in our best.


The fire, the smoke,the crackers light up the sky,
Hope we too had a home, at least for a while.
Little joys of life for a second to hold,
Fun and laughter, of a life time to with hold.

We closed our eyes and turned to the heavens,
Searching for love, bonding and magic that we could amass.
 Just when we felt He heard us right

They came in a palanquin of stars!

                           


                                                 
                                                 

                                         

                                             

A TERRORIST"S DIARY

It is a Diwali today, and it was a Diwali six years ago…

The markets of Jaipur have their very own charm during the festival of lights. Every shop adorned with the festive paraphernalia looks like a piece of Eden. On one such morning of festivity I am looking at the happy faces of families shopping for the occasion. Young couples secretly exchange glances while buying lamps to light up their new world. Children pull their fathers in and out of a dozen shops in confusion about which crackers to buy. Women clad in red and green bargain with the vendors for a string of fresh jasmines. The milieu is filled with the aroma of delicious sweets and red roses. It’s a moment of sheer joy and pleasure for every person on the busy streets. A smile on every face, a known anticipation to get back home to a waiting family, a hustle that is very much enjoyed.

 I stand at a tea shop looking at this panorama of bonding. I am a chemical engineer by profession and a brilliant one too. The ‘sweets’ that will be savored by the people in a few minutes from now are a proof for the same. My company pays me seventy grand a month for my genius. But that is not enough for an ordinary man like me who has risen from the clutches of poverty. My other ‘company’ takes care of my greed and need.

As a child, I sacrificed simple joys of life to save a paisa for my family. The festival was just another day for me. While other children of my locality feasted to sweets, they simply reminded of the bitterness of the financial crisis my family was a prey to. The noise of the crackers seemed to echo the rich state of a family supported by a father who earned a meager income for a living. My family would not be a subject to the same.

I look like an ordinary man to this ordinary crowd. They are unaware of my religion or the mask I wear. I simply walk past them, enter a shop selling apparel. I fiddle with a few kurtas and chunris, I fake an argument with the shop keeper and finally settle for a priceless piece of ethnic wear. The Maarwaari seems pleased with the fat bundle of crisp notes I pay. Maybe he is dreaming of a much more grand evening than he had planned. In the happiness he fails to notice that I silently place the bag containing the ‘sweet’ fruits of my labour. I quickly walk away to another market of the city to do my real shopping for the festival.

I hear a blast. People around me are happier now they think the first signs of the festival have seemed to appear. There is smoke, there is chaos, there is blood, there is a home I walk back to..

I see blood all over my daughter’s face. A black car hit her and sped away while she was enjoying the festival. My wife and I immediately rushed her to the hospital. From two nights my wife has been bowing her head before every divine structure and asking Him what wrong have we done for this fate. She does not know. The blue sky is sprawled with red stars from a rocket. I see only blood. Blood I have shed. Tears that have been my gift. Sorrow that I had brew.  

I feel the pain of the father who lost his child, the poignancy of the fate of a wife whose flame of happiness was extinguished by me, the curse of a mother for her shattered home, the shout of a son for his departed parents.

Dear Lord, I am a new person now. I won’t surrender to the police. They will keep me a prisoner, rather like an item of cheap advertising. There is no forgiveness for what I have done, I can never unwind that. I shall make the remaining of my life fruitful in service to many. I shall find every opportunity to help, to serve, to surrender, to ease pain, to do what I should have done. I shall kneel before every Allah, every Christ, every Shiva to bless the world. I shall make money for the strangers who are your creations. I shall do some good, I shall not unmask my selves for the greater good. My daughter is your amenity now. I surrender only to you.

           -         No longer a terrorist

           Karan Asmal Singh Anthony Baweja

   

FOR THE UNLOVED...

It does happen sometimes, that the love that is sought gets dissolved in the eddies of greed,jealousy,ego or simply inhumanity. This is for the 'unloved' ,for the ones who deserved it all!




Dear Mummy,
When I was in your womb, I knew I was safe.Though it was dark and dull inside,I knew that one day two loving arms will hold me to light. I knew that two sparkling eyes would feast on my little body.I knew the dark place I am in now would soon transform into a world of sheer beauty. I knew a family would drown me in the sea of love and I would float in heavens. I knew daddy would throw me up in the air and i would glade like a phoenix feather, I would be an angel! But, mummy I was wrong. I didn't know your love was for your prince and not your princess. The day you discovered it, two tattered arms threw me in dust. I cried, I was unheard. I thrust for my love but all I got was poisonous glances from the world. I was left alone, in the same world that I thought was of sheer joy. I am floating towards the heaven now, UNLOVED....




Dear Daddy,
I remember the day you disowned me. I was eighteen, your son, your blood. I thought it was love that made me your pride, but then, I discovered your pride was in a distinction shouting from my college degree. Dad, I tried. I worked hard. I sacrificed my little joys of life. But I could not. It was not my take. I thought I would see the same pride in your eyes when I won the under 18 World cup. You would hug me and tell the world I was your 'son', your blood! But you had other plans.  You threw me out of our home. You hit mummy when she pleaded. You made me beg in the streets for food, sleep under shackled roofs. I wore tattered clothes for days, the under 18 World Cup Captain of the year smelt like filth. You never even tried to search for me. 
Today dad, I am our country's captain, won glories that are your and my soil's pride, millions love me not only for what I am, but also for what I am not. I am still your son, UNLOVED....


Dear Husband,
I left my home for your home to be complete.  I adorned myself with a sacred bond that is supposed to make us both complete. I offered my life for your dreams, your family,your clan. For your parents, I was a daughter-in-law who bowed with respect but was made to bow like in shame. For you I was a doll of clay that you played with when you liked and threw in some corner when you had enough. I never complained when you came home smelling like the drains, over filling yourselves with cheap bottles of beer. I sustained the smacks, the pain, the fear, the violence, the shame. I waited for the grace of love, for the blessing. None came. Today I leave as a woman whose chaste is more dear to her than the life of a wife UNLOVED....


Dear Mr. X,
I thought love happened only in fairy tales, till the day you came into my life. It was a bundle of everything I felt for you-love,care,respect,friendship and all the beautiful emotions of the world.People called me mad, ridiculed the change in me but I was the happiest. What I felt, was only what I knew. With you, my fears lost their existence, hope grew. I felt more secure, like a bird flying away from its cage into the vast skies.I opened my heart that were burdened with so many secrets. I thought you would understand.You gave no respect for my feelings, for the love I showed. I cried into the nights, my tears noticed by you. You laughed at them like you would for a clown in the circus. Maybe I was not one of those pretty girls you knew, maybe my life was cushioned with principles you did not like, or you thought I was ugly enough to stand beside you. Once, did you even peek inside my heart that was beautiful enough. For once, did you not feel that a little bit of love would heal.You mocked, you sowed the seedling of hatred in me. While I weep, the plant grows from the heart of an UNLOVED...


Dear Friend,
I just told you you were treading on the wrong path of life. I warned you for the dangers that would ruin your career. You felt I was interfering.You thought I was a person who was too serious with my career and success. You left me alone in all celebrations, you used me when needed. You poisoned  other's mind that I was no fun. And when you  fell in your own grave you dug for yourselves, you were too ashamed to climb up and ask for a simple sorry. Your ego was too big in comparison of our months of friendship.I made mistakes too and I accepted them. But you didn't. I am all alone today, cause you stole the rest of my friends from me. You gave me sorrow, while I still find an opportunity to make your life brighter. From a friend who has forgiven, who is still UNLOVED...